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Funny and irritating gym situations that have either happened to you in the past or will probably happen to you in the future!

Being a fitness junkie, I’ve seen some funny and irritating gym situations that have either happened to me, or I seen it happen to others. These may have also happened to your in the past or will probably happen to you in the future, so watch out!

 JOHNNY BRAVO SYNDROME

The guy who pulls off  his shirt and starts flexing in the mirror when he thinks you’re not looking.

The guy next to you, who is of the same size and age as you, who uses three times more weight than you – WITHOUT cheating! This is so me, lmao.

The huge guys with a bright red face, bitch tits pressing through his shirt, and back covered with oily acne, who gets totally enraged when anyone wonders whether his recent 30 lbs gains in muscle mass is partly caused by drugs.

The big dude who gets a kick out of letting the whole weight stack come crashing down at 124 dB – every rep, every set, every day.

SASQUATCH SIGHTINGS

The guy with a furry back who insists on standing right in front of you when you try to focus on your own form in the mirror.

The same guy with the same furry back, who never wipes off the bench after use, leaving a puddle of sweat large enough for a duck to swim in. Half an hour later you find loose hairs from his back stuck with the dried-in sweat to the pad.

This is also the same guy that walks around the locker room butt a$$ naked. I just threw up in my mouth, lol.

THE WISE KNOW ALL

The old guy who sees no wrong in setting the treadmill to the very lowest setting, and staying on it for an hour and a half while others are in line.

The old guy who’s intimidated by the gym, and makes up for it by pretending to be an expert.

The guy who gives loud and very, very bad training advice to his admiring girlfriend.

MR/MS PLATEAU

This is that guy/girl you’ve seen in the gym for days, months, even years and there physique NEVER changes. NEVER.

The guy that comes waits eagerly to get on the machine your using to do one set then walks off.

The guy/girl who goes to the gym to workout, drinks a diet soda, and swears they are hydrated. You see them in the locker room and look like ready to pass out. This is also the person that once they recover from wanting to pass out, they stop by McDonald’s for a #3.

The moron who runs off to bug the staff every five minutes, because he has objections to the music they’re playing instead of buying an MP3 player.

The guy/girl who spends up to an hour doing cardio, does 2 sets of 2 exercise and wonders why they can NEVER gain weight. This falls into the category of WTF, lol.

GIRLS, GIRLS, GIRLS

The teenage girl who spends 30 minutes putting on her makeup, then does two sets of bicep-curls with 1-pound dumbbells, does 5 minutes on the Stairmaster, and then goes home.

The woman in a thong who likes doing stiff-legged deadlifts, just to see if she can make one of the guys drop a dumbbell on his foot.

The diva that glares at everyone standing within 10 feet of him in front of the mirror – on a Monday night when people are stacked in three layers around him.

The young couple that sees no wrong in very intimate making out between sets.

BAD FORM

The guy who uses terrible form, but gets personally insulted if the instructors try to correct him.

The 6 foot 8 basketball-player who picks the stairmaster in front of you, effectively blocking the only TV that is not running either baby care product commercials or the Congo Bowling Championships.

The wannabe Hulk who loads on 280 lbs on the barbell and start pounding away bicep curls by throwing his upper body back and forth – without ever bending the elbows.

The powerlifter who would never, EVER unload a barbell, even if he got paid for it.

The cheater who does bench presses by bouncing it off his chest like a springboard.

The wannabe opera singer who screams constantly as he trains legs – from the first rep to the last.

BIKING UP THE WRONG TREE

The slick dude with extremely tight spandex training shorts, who REALLY, REALLY wants there to be no confusion about his gender or sexuality.

The guy in spandex who thoughtlessly stands with his back against a mirror while thoroughly scratching the most intimate parts of his behind or sashaying around the fitness center.

TOO COOL FOR SCHOOL

The guy who wants to show off his expertise by walking his friends around the gym and loudly describe why the other people are morons for working out the way they do.

The person who kicks your water bottle over, and pretends he doesn’t notice.

The dork that hogs up the machine while playing on his Gameboy or cell phone between sets.

YUM … I’LL HAVE THAT

The locker-neighbor who either stores a Danish Goat-cheese or Fritos in his locker, or really should consider getting new shoes.

The pig that eats chocolate-covered candy bars between sets next to you – when you’re on a diet.

The dude with a cold, who sneezes loudly and wetly in his hand, and then grabs the barbell.

YOU A TRAINER – FA REAL

Now I know everyone has seen this guy. He’s the trainer, that don’t look like or has NEVER worked out. They just went and got a certification and the gym hired them. I’m just sayin, lol.

By Chris Kennerly

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